On a whacked sleep schedule yet again, which I don’t mind too much. I was torn between working on a new script for a Femdom audio file, or just giving a go at writing like I used to; like, non-erotic, creative writing. I couldn’t choose, so I am here on my Lipstick Domme journal. This is really the only journal where I get all wordy as of late, so I’m just going to ramble for those who are interested, mixing in relevant keywords pertaining to my erotic work here and there for better SEO, because I am an opportunistic wench.
I’ve been doing seriously well, work-wise. Yes, being an Online Domme, making Femdom hypnosis recordings, taking calls on Niteflirt, and just being Goddess Lycia is my full-time job, in case you were unaware. My latest audio session, “Sublime Seduction, Cruel Control” has been highly lucrative. I thought about taking screen shots of the money I’ve been raking in, but I feel like it is better to not always give people specifics. Hiding certain facts and stats is basically a way of protecting myself. Let me just say that it has been GOOD, and I have been very pleased as a Financial Domme.
I just got stuck for a second, right now, about what to write next. And that caused me to once again realize the struggle there is with people in the entertainment industry, “adult” or otherwise. How much can I share about my thoughts and feelings beyond the topic of Female Domination? Would it be wise or detrimental to my career to share things about my personal life, and where do I draw the line between what is safe to share and what the world doesn’t need to know about? I know I have fans who want to know the real me, everything there is to know- -all aspects of myself. They’d drink up the info and love me even more. But I also don’t want to give people more than they need in order to enjoy me as a Female Dominant and adult entertainer.
Being a Hypnodomme, Humiliatrix, and Online Domme is all very much a part of me. They way I present myself on Twitter and other social media are true representations of myself, but you don’t see the full, complex person I am. All entertainers selectively choose what we want to share and how we want to sculpt ourselves for the public. I could never lie about my interests or identity for 10+ years, which is how long I’ve been doing this Femdom stuff for a living. I truly love BDSM, mind control, and all the things I claim to have interest in. I am part greedy, heartless Findom bitch, but I also have a very generous side. It’s an art in itself, to figure out how to best portray oneself online or to the media in general. And I find I am most comfortable showing my soft side as well as my sadistic side, but I am careful about what I share, when I share it, and how I word it.
And anyway, to be honest, just because I have a soft side and a depth beyond what I normally share with my followers, doesn’t mean I am “soft” with my slaves. Everything is on a case-by-case basis. Some slaves, I have more compassion for, and I want to take it somewhat easy on them. I want them to serve me the best they can, but I also want to help moderate their spending, and I am interested in their personal well-being. Other slaves inspire me to be ruthless and uncaring, and I literally could not care less if their families fall apart because of how reckless they become with their spending and perverse behavior. And there are is an entire spectrum of in-betweens. It depends on the feelings a slave brings out in me upon my getting to know them.
Which reminds me of a journal entry one of my on-and-off slaves wrote recently, in which he questions how real this is. You know, online Findom and Femdom relations. And my answer is that, on a case-by-case basis, it’s as real as the parties involved want it to be. That’s all. We make up our minds about whether this is all a game or if the relationships we have online are genuine. We decide to which degree they are genuine. And I like it that way. I like the journey of finding out where we all stand with one another.
Okay, I feel like I got some stuff out of my system. I think I’ll read for a bit.
*Multiple kissies swimming fervently you-know-where*